** This story begins with four brothers, sitting on each
side of a square dining table. **
Bhim: I don’t like how you guys spend your free time. Why do
you guys not do some productive work?
Sen: Wow! Are you serious? Who do you think you are?
Nath: I know, right. You don’t have any right to decide what we
do, Bhim.
Bhim : Are you guys out of your mind? I am the eldest of all
of you, and I have been taking care of each one of you since you were young.
Nath: So what! You cannot rule us. You did it just because Mom asked you to take care of us when she left Dad fifteen years ago.
Pant: Stop it, Nath. He is our elder brother. He took care of
us.
Sen: You are just a small kid, Pant. You will know Bhim’s
real character when you grow a little older like us, in few years. He doesn’t
love us at all.
Nath: Very true, Sen. He just cares about his money and his
friends.
Pant: Why do you guys say that to him? He cares about us.
Bhim: It is okay, Pant. Just leave it. These are two rotten
eggs of our family.
Sen: Right! Do you remember that one time when Nath was so
sick that he was not able to get out of his bed?
Pant: Yes, I do. so?
Sen: So, where was your brother Bhim then?
Pant: He left with his friends early morning and came back
after two days!!! Wow! You really don’t care about us. Do you, Bhim?
Bhim: You are my brothers, and I love you all.
Sen: You sure do love your brothers, but just when Nath
needed you the most you left him to suffer, didn’t you?
Nath: Actually, guys, I will have to defend Bhim on that
part.
Pant: What are you saying, Nath? Did he not leave you to
suffer?
Sen: What???
Nath: Yes, my brothers. Bhim was there for me. I woke up that
night and saw Bhim on my side. He bought me the medicine. Do you remember, Sen,
the medicine that was on the table?
Sen: Yes.
Nath: It was Bhim who bought the medicine.
Pant: So, why did we not see you for two days?
Bhim: Leave it, guys.
Sen: Tell us, Bhim. Where were you?
Bhim: It is not that important. Just leave it. I am sorry that I
asked you guys to spend your spare time being productive. I am sorry, because I
thought if you guys would study or do some work it would help you.
Nath: Just tell us, Bhim.
 |
| Vali and Sugriva Source: Vali and Sugriva in a fight |
Bhim: Okay. My dear brothers, when Nath got sick that day I
knew he would not get better without medicine. We were in very bad shape
financially. I had a job, but it wasn’t paying that well and I was in no
situation to buy him the medicine that he needed right away. So, I left that
early morning with my friend to go to the bus station in our town. He played the
guitar and I sang in the station all day. We collected some money and with that
money, I bought some medicine for Nath. I came home that night but, Sen and
Pant were already asleep. I left really
early the next morning, because I had promised my friend that I would help him
move his apartment.
Pant: I told you guys, our brother loves us. I am sorry, Bhim, I doubted you.
Bhim: No worries, my precious. I love you.
Sen: I am sorry, Bhim.
** Bhim stands up **
Bhim: So, brothers, hug!
** Nath, Sen and Pant get up **
Nath/Sen/Pant: **in one voice** Bring it in, brother.
** after few seconds**
Bhim: So, I don’t like how you guys spend your free time.
Why do you guys not do some productive work?
** They all laugh and go back in their room**
 |
| Two Brothers Source:Two brothers on a way to their school |
Author’s Note:
The story of the Ramayana in PDE version part C was focused on the brothers Sugriva and Vali, who fought with each other, and also shared some love. Also, the story extends to Ravana and his brotherVibhishana who was living in Lanka, but then Vibhishana leaves him for his bad decision regarding the abduction of Sita. The story of the brothers, in Ramayana PDE version shares the love and hate. Sugriva loves his brother vali, but hates him at the same time. Vibhishana loves his brother and also hate him at the same time. So, this week I am telling the story of four brothers, who loved each other and also fought time
and again. They are actually having conversations, and I have tried to make it as interesting as possible. I have chosen to use the script storytelling style for this week’s
Storytelling.I have selected the image of Vali and Sugriva in a fight as one of my images which reflects the anger and madness that the two brothers shared. I have chosen a cartoon character for my second picture which reflects the care and the love that brothers share. I came up with this story for every household has some arguments and fights that take place but that doesn't mean there is no love between them. The arguments that happen are just a part of a life.
Bibliography:
"Public Domain
Editions" of the Ramayana.
I liked how this story was told through dialogue, it made me feel as if I were there in the room with these brothers. I have two brothers and the loving each other, but also fighting a lot is spot on. Good job showing that we should not jump to conclusions when we do not know all of the facts about the situation.
ReplyDeleteSo specific with the square dining table – that’s a nice touch to really help the reader visualize your story. You really nailed the bickering sibling characters. You did a good job of creating an interesting dialogue. I agree with your Author’s Note that although every household has some arguments, there is still a lot of love! I really enjoyed this story.
ReplyDeleteHi there, Shristi!
ReplyDeleteI really love how you used the screenplay storytelling style for this retelling! I haven’t actually seen anyone else do it yet, and I feel like you pulled it off really seamlessly. The amount of dialogue you included compared to the amount of screen direction/action was great, but it probably wouldn’t have hurt to include a few more lines about facial expressions or body language—screenwriters commonly include that sort of thing to give the actors an idea of what the character is thinking; just an idea! Your story is great, as is. I especially liked the very heartwarming ending. I don’t have siblings, but you made the bickering seem so real, and I can definitely see that being a fight which would come up when an older child is taking care of the younger ones. You did a really good job of taking life-like situations and using them to create the retelling. Nicely done!
Shristi,
ReplyDeleteGreat application of narrating your story through dialogue. I always enjoy reading heavily dialogued stories, because it makes the story more real for me and not many people do it. I love the dynamic of sibling rivalry in a story, because most people, including myself, can relate very easily to this in some degree. I think the image you used compliments the story very well. Thanks for the great read!
I really like the style of your writing for “The Brothers”, it makes it fast paced and easy to read. The story reminded me a lot of my siblings (I’m the youngest of four). In a lot of ways this is how we act toward one another. We have serious and not so serious arguments, but in time we forgive one another and move on to better and more pressing things. I completely agree that family arguments are one of those things that happens in life, it’s whether we decide to forgive or not that determines the relationship standing (I hope that makes sense). I can’t help but see some humor in the story and I hope you will really give us some funny arguments in the future, it would be a nice to have a story that is not heartbreaking or serious. I also, really enjoy your background, It’s so colorful and pretty. Again, great job I can’t wait to see what else is in store for everyone!
ReplyDeleteShristi,
ReplyDeleteI liked that you decided to script as your storytelling style. It really works well with your story. As the eldest of four myself, I can really relate to your story. I know my siblings do not really appreciate it when I tell them what to do, but I still tell them because I am the oldest. It is almost like it is what you are supposed to do as the first child. I like how you focused on the relationship of the siblings. Love and hate. Unfortunately that is how it goes a lot of the time. I don't always agree with my siblings at all times but you still love them. There is nothing like the relationship between siblings. There is no person that will love you, protect you, and argue with you like a brother or sister will. I think your pictures were an excellent choice for your story.
Hi Shristi,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your story! It goes to show that we need to make sure that we know the full story before we begin to judge people. I like how the different brothers had different personalities. Some tended to give Bhim the benefit of the doubt while some were always looking for something to blame him for. I feel like that gave the story more depth and development. One thing that I think you could add to your story is you could a a couple of comical lines throughout the story. I feel like with this type of story, a little bit of comic relief can go a long way to keep the the story light. Otherwise, I think you story flowed very nicely and it was easy to read and comprehend. You did a great job! Thanks for sharing!